7 Super-fast Ways to Prime Your Super-Self-Belief
Owning your Personal Style and Brand will ask you to do a major thing…believe in yourself.
Stepping out and showing up in your upgraded version in order to upgrade your client attraction will call on every part of your ability to be, say, and do you authentically!
Marketing calls us to continually project ideas and solutions to our audience. In the early stages of entrepreneurship, before we ‘cut out teeth’ or prove our results, it will take every ounce of self-belief to stand by our promises with absolute confidence. Nearly every one of my clients comes face-to-face with this inner work at some point, even if they have been in business for some time because our self-image is really quite existential! However, the beautiful thing about self-belief, which is so close to self-image, is that, even though it comes naturally with time and experience, it helps to start practising and not stop as you grow and your business grows!
So here is my 7 Primer Blueprint to get a leap ahead of the competition (including with your inner saboteurs!) and muscle up your self-image and self-belief.
Even picking one of these primers to work on every month will help!
So, let’s dive in…I’ve given examples of where and how this shows up for us in the form of a self-belief ‘wobble’!
Primer 1 – You can learn it!
When does the wobble play out?
All kinds of marketing, standing behind your pricing, believing in your offers, enrolling easily etc!
Remember, even if you lack some self-belief now (and almost everyone does, even at a subconscious level), self-belief is a learnable human skill. It is, of course, indispensable to all human achievement. Your level of self-belief is flexible. We can all be flexible and change, even’ fly’.
Remember, you were born into this world with no sense of what you could or couldn’t do. Then, bit by bit, life started to teach you to limit yourself.
A very young child never says, “I’m not the kind of person who could…” (fill in the blank). They haven’t yet learned to limit their horizons or listened to people who express pessimism. One of the first steps is to re-examine and discard many limiting ideas about yourself that you’ve collected along the way.
Primer 2 – Deal with the bitch inside!
When does the wobble out? Comparisonitis, FOMO, invisibility and perfectionism.
You are not listening! When you start to doubt yourself, listen, for a moment, to that little negative inner voice. Whose voice is it really?
A parent’s old school bullies? A collection of lots of different voices from different times and people? That little inner self-critical voice may sound very bitchy, but it wasn’t yours originally. It may masquerade as belonging to you now, but it is like a worn-out coat you’ve got so used to that you can’t throw it away.
But it is something you can discard at will. Firstly, you’ve got to catch yourself when the voice pipes up… Recognise it as not THE TRUTH. NOT YOU! Then, start to challenge it and also just plain ignore it.
Primer – 3 Flip a weakness into a strength.
When does the wobble out? Doubt about your unique selling propositions, feeling like you always need more training, starting out or even from scratch, justifying, needing validaiton.
Dumbo, Walt Disney’s flying quadruped, was humiliated by his outsize ears. He hated them at first. But, he used them over time to fulfil his destiny by changing his attitude.
If we focus on what is not right about ourselves rather than what is unique and beautiful, we miss opportunities for self-belief. We shouldn’t assume there’s nothing to improve about ourselves (that’s the work of a lifetime!), but just focusing on perceived weaknesses without either a) taking steps to improve them or b) also giving fair focus toward our strengths gets us nowhere.
For example, if you know you can be stubborn, find the positive in that! Stubbornness is used well and is called single-minded determination. If you worry a lot, know that the positive flip side is that you have a powerful imagination that can be put to good, creative use in the proper context.
Being ADD may signify multiple talents just waiting to be revealed! Whatever we consider our fallibilities to be are opportunities for greatness.
Take any negative belief you may have about yourself and creatively flip it so that it becomes, in its place, a positive resource: (think: ‘ears/Dumbo ‘- meaning ‘Outsize Ears = Born to FLY).
Remember Tom Hanks in ‘Saving Private Ryan’… handicapped but born to run and inspire… (think: simple, loving and devoted = courageous and inspiring!
Primer 4- Develop your ‘superhero powers’!
When does the wobble out? Feeling pressured to conform or naturally slidinginto a cookie-cutter version of your mentors, lack of mission and vision in your work, unsure of message.
Think of the typical powers of the more famous superheroes, and write them down before you start your day. They may be super-speed, able to climb walls, flight, x-ray vision, or whatever.
Why do I suggest this? Because ‘priming’ your mind with iconic qualities and positive characteristics like these can determine your behaviour.
It’s not that you’ll start flying to the rescue of stranded citizens, but the pattern of superhero powers is one of ability, courage, and competence. In one study, people were asked to write down as many superpowers as possible. They were likelier to give to charity months later. The pattern of giving to charity is that of ‘Being Able’.
Prime your mind with ‘Being Able words’ before you start each day. As well as superhero powers, write all kinds of other positive characteristics (whether you think you have them). Before entering the world, let your inner icon guide your day. I’m not just asking you to focus on your present or future qualities here but on the power of the qualities listed. Take a few moments to write down the ones that speak to you daily; reflect upon what each word means.
Primer 5: Be your own mentor!
When does the wobble out? When you sign up again and again for training and programs because you never feel ready or enough.
Whenever you notice the shadow demons of negative self-talk lurking, play a game and imagine that (the clear-headed part of you) is the mentor and the anxious part of you is the person you need to talk to. Imagine what you’d say to someone you believe in if they started doubting themselves and saying those same things to yourself. Do your own work!
So, if you are about to close a big deal and you hear yourself beginning to have parasite doubt thoughts, take a few moments to sit down, close your eyes, and coach yourself. Say something like.. “Look, you can do this; it’s well within your skills!”
Feeling anxious is natural, but that means you care about your actions! You’ve got all the relevant experience and qualifications to get this opportunity! You know you can serve this client at your highest level; it’s your destiny! You’re uplevelling, and you are ready!”
Picture the successful, friendly, straight-talking coach in your mind. Is it someone you know or would like to know? Talking to yourself in these terms as if you were another person (in the privacy of your mind ) can ramp up your confidence fast.
Try summoning your own council of wise ones. People who mean or have meant a great deal to you, people you admire and trust implicitly. People who love you unconditionally and want your highest good. These can be real or imagined mentors! Living or departed. Mentors mirror back to us our best qualities and weaknesses… but when push comes to shove in an emergency, we can see those qualities in ourselves, by ourselves, with practice. We are always our own most outstanding teachers, so trust your intuition, your journey, your opinion, your personal preferences and your personal space. Give yourself credit by repeating often: “I AM doing the best I can do, and it is enough”.
Primer – 6 It’s all a joke, anyway!
When does the wobble out? Most days of entrepreneurial life!
Try to detach from the seriousness of self-belief by seeing all situations with humour. Laugh at your foibles and eccentricities. Try talking to your super self in the mirror, sometimes with great love, respect and admiration, sometimes with gentle, loving teasing. Lighten up the whole process of your journey by PLAYing.
We are all actors on the grand stage of life, and comedy is a powerful way to add verve and boldness to our intentions and habits. Self-belief comes easily when we can stand back from ourselves and see the brilliance with love and a rollin’ about giggle on the floor. Learn to befriend your ego instead of chastising it…. it is doing a fine job of heralding your individuality and being concerned for your safety.
Buy it a beer sometime, and chink glasses at its’ hilarious escapades in trying to persuade you that you are separate from the world and somehow the most special of them all! Egos chill out when you’re both involved in the same comedy of life, so lighten up.
Primer – 7 Create a powerful vision of yourself.
When does the wobble out? Believing that those ‘further ahead’ are somehow better than you or have superior lives.
Self-belief comes by reminding yourself that you can do things that great gurus are doing. You are no different, neither more nor less intelligent or gifted than any other human being in the eyes of the universe. You can thump your chest like Tarzan or ‘blow your own trumpet’ in the company of others.
Still, genuine self-belief comes from the simplest acts – committing to where you want to go and following through. Self-belief is actually an intention in action. It begins with seeing yourself do it!
Get into the habit of sitting down, closing your eyes, and watching yourself behaving decisively, calmly, and strongly. This powerful visualisation exercise means you can learn from yourself how to be confident, have self-belief, and behave in ways which maximise your chances of success. Imagine you are viewing yourself on a TV screen. The ‘you’ on the screen shows you how to act with self-belief. The more you do this, the more you’ll find that you’ll quite naturally start to become like the ‘you’ in the movie.
The more you are inspired by purpose, mission and values, the less you will care about the external parameters that destabilise your best intentions. It is normal and human to wobble. It is normal and entrepreneurial to wobble at the vast amount of complex things you need to master to grow and scale your business. It is super normal and even likely that when you stand up in your genius, shining Divine Personal Brand, you will sometimes wonder if it’s really you! So just remind yourself that Self-Belief is like any ‘inner strength muscle’ – it needs working daily.
In my Divine Branding process, my clients are calibrated by their own personal, quantum blueprint so powerfully that it becomes a process of revelation of hat was there all along.
Self-belief really does become effortless when you’re dialled into alignment, the universe, energy, and the ‘cosmic’ aspects of the beautiful wonder that is business. You’d better believe it!
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